Fake your thoughts until you make it
What people tell themselves often enough becomes their reality.
By Katharina Beer, decision architect ·
“Fake it till you make it.” This phrase accompanies people who want to achieve something that does not yet feel real. The phrase contains a kernel of truth.
What a person talks themselves into often enough becomes their reality. The mind does not check whether something is true. The mind takes it in and aligns action accordingly. Whoever keeps telling themselves they are not enough acts accordingly. Whoever tells themselves something else goes in a different direction.
Watching thoughts nonstop
The basic problemSome advise constantly observing one’s own thoughts.
Anyone who tries this for a day quickly notices how exhausting it is. It is almost impossible. Thoughts run through the mind all day, and no one manages to perceive every single one consciously.
I consider this approach of little help. Anyone who monitors their thoughts all day has hardly any energy left for what they set out to do. If you like, try it for a day.
My conviction
The key statementA person’s reality begins with their stance, and the thoughts follow it.
A stance can be changed deliberately. After that, thoughts can be chosen that fit this stance and strengthen one’s own undertaking.
An image for this: someone who crouches down and looks at their surroundings from there perceives them differently from someone who has just straightened up and stretched out their arms. The room stays the same, and perception changes with the stance. You can try this in a minute.
Fear may be there
Fear is part of it, and it may be there. Whoever has something in mind does not first have to be free of fear.
When I wanted to bring my twin boys into the world naturally, after three caesarean sections, every doctor advised against it. Of course I was afraid. I imagined this and that. But I wanted this birth so much. I decided for myself that I would do everything to at least try, and I believed that I could do it. That is my personal experience and not a recommendation for others.
At least the belief in it and the idea of what shall be must be there. Without this belief and this idea, there is nothing to hold on to.
The desired state
This desired state I build with my clients. For me and for them, this approach has led to success again and again.